Launch Protocol
S
$29.99
Sale price
$29.99
Regular price
Skip to product information
Launch Protocol
$29.99
Sale price
$29.99
Regular price
— GENERATION RECEIPT —
CERTIFICATE OF INAUTHENTICITY
PROMPT: “A red circuit-board spaceship erupts from a kaleidoscope of mirrored geometric panels, thick white smoke billowing from its thrusters in dense, curling columns.”
MEDIUM: machine dream, heat-pressed onto cotton
HUMANS INVOLVED: minimum viable
APOLOGIES: none
The shirt
Unisex staple tee (Bella+Canvas 3001) in black. 100% combed ring-spun cotton, 4.2 oz/yd² — soft, pre-shrunk, side-seamed, regular fit. Machine wash cold inside-out, tumble dry low, and don't iron the print.
Size guide (inches)
| S | M | L | XL | 2XL | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Width | 18 | 20 | 22 | 24 | 26 |
| Length | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 |
Between sizes? Size up.
Shipping & returns
Every shirt is printed when you order it — nothing exists until you do. Production takes 2–5 business days, then shipping (typically 3–8 business days in the US, tracked).
Misprinted, damaged, or wrong item? We replace it free — email us within 30 days. Wrong size? There's no warehouse, only consequences — but email us anyway and we'll be human about it. We're the only humans in this operation.
First order ships free when you join the list — code SLOPSHIP.